Skirts with Pockets

Well here we are.  We began this project 23 hours ago, and we’re finally on our last topic…cartoons.  This is not going to be a very long post.

My two favorite cartoons are Venture Bros. and Futurama.  Venture Bros. focuses on former boy adventurer Rusty Venture who, with the help of bodyguard Brock Sampson who can survive anything including but not limited to an overdose of tranquilizers and floating in outer space without a suit, raises his sons Hank and Dean who lack all common sense, and it’s hilarious.  Futurama is about a delivery company in the 31st century which employs a really old dude, a female cyclops, a self-centered rich girl, an incompetent alien doctor who kind of looks like a lobster, a robot, a Jamaican accountant, and Philip J. Frye  from the 21st century because he was accidentally cryogenically frozen, and it’s hilarious.

24 hours with no sleep.  This post is completely against my nature as it is mostly comprised of two run-on sentences, but I don’t care.  I’m going to bed.

Blog Day was a blast.  Good night everyone!

I’m just going to pick one:  The Princess Bride.  It is probably my favorite 80s movie, and it was made the year I was born (1987).  It was directed by Rob Reiner, and it starred Cary Elwes and Robin Wright.  This movie is everything wrapped up into an hour and half.  It has fantasy, love, adventure, comedy, torture, and rodents of unusual sizes.  Everyone who has seen that movie can quote it.  “My name is Inigo Montoya.  You killed my father.  Prepare to die.”  I think one of the things I loved most about this movie is how absolutely ridiculous it is.  Westley avoids death because of his developed immunity to iocane powder, a fictional toxin with no taste or smell.  After dying by some weird method of torture, he is brought back to life through the use of a bellows and chocolate.  If you need anymore evidence as to why this movie is so ridiculous, just watch the marriage scene and listen to the priest.  That’s it.  It’s ridiculous.  It’s a classic.  You should watch it.

I feel the following awkward moment is apt considering my previous blog on my clumsiness.  I think one of the most awkward things is when you trip and/or fall, and you’re not with any of your friends.  If you’re walking along with your friends and you slip and fall, you can very easily laugh it off.  You can even throw in a little, “I can’t believe I just did that!”  It’s when you’re alone amidst a bunch of strangers that it gets awkward.  You can’t just start laughing or talking to yourself.  You’ll look like an even bigger fool.  All you can do is brush yourself off, embrace the embarrassment, and continue on your way.

Two more of these things to go…

I hate bad grammar.  It makes me cringe when I see a spelling mistake or a misplaced comma.  I apologize if I have any of those floating around in my previous posts.  I’m going on hour 21 of this thing, and I desperately need sleep.  Back to the topic at hand…

It never ceases to amaze me when I find an error in a newsletter or any other public document.  You know that a lot of people are going to read this, and I assume you want to present yourself as a professional.  How do you not take the time to read through what you have written to ensure there are no mistakes?  I’m a real stickler for commas.  If the sentence begins with a dependent clause and is followed by a…you know what?  I can already hear Tim yelling, “Bored!” in my head, so I’m just going to stop right there.

I hope my fellow bloggers do not take offense to this.  This is not directed at you.  I understand we are all very tired.  These are special circumstances.  I have nothing else to say except I hate bad grammar, and I love the oxford comma.

I would have to say 3rd grade was my most influential year in school.  I remember so many things from 3rd grade.  We had a project in which we had to choose a famous person and give a report as that person.  I chose Neil Armstrong.  I had the coolest astronaut costume and props.  My helmet was a garbage can with a hole cut out for my face.  We even put one of those transparency pages you use with an overhead projector in as the screen.  I learned my multiplication facts.  I learned how to write in cursive.  I learned all about the state of New Mexico for a social studies project.  More importantly, this is the year that determined the direction my life would go.  This is the year I decided I wanted to be a teacher.

My 1st and 2nd grade teachers were terrible.  They were mean and bent on embarrassing their students.  I will never forget when my 2nd grade teacher chose to punish a poor boy in our class for talking by making him wear a paper bag on his head.  Mrs. Underwood, my 3rd grade teacher, was the first to make me enjoy coming to school again.  She was very creative and could turn the most boring topic into something exciting.  Her room was decorated like the rain forest.  This was the year of my first and only class economy.  We even had a bank set up where we kept everyone’s fake money.  I was 10 years old, and I decided I wanted to make kids love school just as much as Mrs. Underwood did.

I started playing school at home.  I positioned all of my stuffed animals into rows of “desks.”  I took attendance using names of my classmates, and I taught the class whatever I had learned in school that day.  It has been 13 years since my very young self taught her stuffed animals about multiplication and cursive writing and New Mexico, and now I’m actually doing it.  I’m working in an elementary school teaching a 1st grade class.  I’m doing what I love.  So thank you Mrs. Underwood.  You probably have no idea how much having you as a teacher would influence where my life would take me.

It’s 5 o’clock in the morning, and I am much too tired to take this one very seriously, so I’m going to talk about my clumsiness.  I am probably one of the clumsiest people you will ever meet.  How I have gone my entire life without breaking a bone is beyond me.  I have strained five fingers.  Two of these incidents were something to brag about, but the others were a bit more embarrassing.  I won’t bore you with non self-deprecating incidents because that’s not what this blog is supposed to be about.  Of the three embarrassing scenarios, one was from catching a basketball, one was from catching a softball with my glove-free hand, and the other was from running into a giant box of pool equipment.

I sprained my ankle once on a camping trip.  We weren’t even doing something cool like rock climbing or hiking or wrestling bears.  We had just gotten there and we were scoping out the area for a good site to put up the tents.  I tripped on a root, twisted my ankle, and fell into a bush.  I hiked up the mountain the next day with the help of a large walking stick we found along the trail.

This fault of mine also comes into play during mealtime.  As pathetic as this is going to sound, I cannot remember going an entire day without spilling something on myself.  Those closest to me can attest to this.  I really should wear a smock while I eat.  Eating should be simple right?  Something always manages to fall off of my fork or out of my glass.

I am working on becoming less clumsy.  I have been practicing yoga, and I believe this will help improve my balance.  It’s not the only reason I’m doing yoga, but it’s definitely a perk.

If I could have any superpower (or ability to cast magic spell in this case), it would be the ability to aparate.  For those of you who are not familiar with this Harry Potterism, aparating is the ability to will yourself from one place to another.  You simply disappear from your original location and reappear in your desired location.
I feel this would be a most convenient superpower.  It would eliminate my need for a car.  Driving makes me nervous enough.  With all the crazies on the road (see Topic 4-Methods of Destroying Traffic), driving can be a very stressful experience for me.  If you’ve been in a car with me, you know what I’m talking about.  Anyway, driving would be completely unnecessary if I could aparate.  Added Bonus:  This would also eliminate the monthly bill for auto insurance.

I would almost never be late.  I can’t quite say never because I can’t promise that I would be showered and ready to go every time I needed to be somewhere.  Chances are I would take advantage of this power and sleep in an extra half hour knowing it would take me mere seconds to get where I needed to go.

It would be absolutely free to travel.  Food and lodging are a different story, but plane tickets are expensive and they would be a thing of the past for me.  No more airport security or lost luggage, no more missing connecting flights because the first flight was delayed, no more sitting in those uncomfortable seats next to even more uncomfortable people.  I just tell myself I want to go to Paris, and I’m there.

I could even bring my friends with me.  As long as you’ve got a hold of my arm or shoulder or whatever, you are aparating with me.  I mean there’s always the risk you’ll get splinched, but hey we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.  At least we’ll be in Paris right?

I have always wished I was a good singer.  I can play the cello and the piano, but these are both practiced skills.  Anyone can do these things if they put enough time and effort into them.  Having the ability to sing is something that you’ve either got or you don’t.  It can’t be learned if you don’t have the natural ability.

Some people don’t really like to sing.  I have never heard my sister sing along with anything.  There’s nothing wrong with it; she just prefers listening to the songs and nothing more.  I sing all the time, but I don’t really give it my all unless no one is around.  I sing in the shower if I’m home by myself.  I sing in my car when the windows are rolled up.  I sing while I’m cleaning…but I don’t sing well.  I can sing in tune, but I definitely would not say it is pleasant to listen to.

I’m always so impressed when I hear someone I know sing very well.  It’s such an awesome talent to have even if you are not a rock star.  To be able to jam with your friends or bust it out at an open mic night sounds like so much fun.  As this is something I cannot change, I will continue to enjoy singing to myself and leave it at that.

I have an insanely good memory.  I know that may sound weird after my lackluster blog about Cleveland and how I couldn’t remember anything about it, but I assure you that most of the time my memory is amazing.  I’m weird about birthdays.  If you tell me when your birthday is, I will never forget it.  I can still remember the birthdays of friends I haven’t spoken to since high school.  I can remember very small details of things that happened to me when I was in grade school.

I’m also quite skilled when it comes to decorating for a party or wrapping gifts.  This is due to the three years’ experience I have working at Maria’s Hallmark when I was in high school.  Every time there is a party at our house, my mom tells me where the decorations are and that’s that.  She even has me decorate for my own birthday parties.  When I wrap gifts, I like to make my own bows out of tulle.  I found this picture through Google, but this is exactly what gifts look like when I’m done with them, true story.

I’m also good at planning.  I’ve had a lot of practice planning when it comes to teaching.  I also rather obsessively plan when it comes to trips and parties.  I map out as much as I possibly can.

A mundane skill you may have that you may not have even considered a skill is snapping your fingers.  I say this is a skill because it is something I cannot do.  I’ve tried and tried but to no avail.  It’s never going to happen.

I apologize for the all over the place nature of this blog.  I am too tired to worry about transitions right now.

I don’t know very much about Cleveland.  I have visited twice to go to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but both instances were a very long time ago.  I went once in 8th grade with my middle school choir, band, and orchestra.  I performed with the orchestra in the common area.  I don’t even remember what songs we played, but I do remember being in the local newspaper.  The second time I visited was with my family, and I don’t know how long ago that was.  We looked at all the cool things, and that was about it.  I remember enjoying the exhibit on the Beatles.  Here’s a link to a pretty great Beatles song for you.